6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
