Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
