we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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