..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize