What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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