so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
