I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize