I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
They took my balls.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
