Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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