oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
