we're blogging at a bar
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Randomize
