alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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