Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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