My Higher Power is John Stamos
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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