Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
