I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Dear god my vagina.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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