Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
