Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
