they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
