5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
