dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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