Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize