nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
