it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
