arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
