this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
