After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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