so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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