I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
