How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
