How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
