Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
