Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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