so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
