I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
