Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
