Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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