For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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