i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
