she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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