ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
