Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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