no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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