idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
