I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
