I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I'm bleeding and have questions
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize