Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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