im gay
i know
yea but for you.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
