So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Houston, we have a squirter
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize