I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
