I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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