But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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