lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
